Taming the Know-It-Alls: A Guide to Dealing with Difficult Team Members.

Because Teams Need Peace, Not Pieces

As an HR expert with over a decade of experience, I’ve come across my fair share of workplace rogues. You know the ones, always convinced they’re right, never willing to budge an inch. They’re the office equivalents of a stubborn mule, but with less charm and more coffee breath. In this post, I’ll share some tips and funny examples to help you manage these challenging personalities and keep your team on track.

• Play the Detective

Sometimes, difficult people aren’t aware of the havoc they’re causing. It’s your job to investigate and uncover the root cause of their behavior. For instance, I once had a team member who’d always interrupt others during meetings. As it turned out, he had a childhood fear of being forgotten because his siblings often left him behind during family trips. With some coaching, we helped him overcome this fear, and he became a more respectful listener. Remember, you’re the Sherlock Holmes of HR, it’s up to you to find the clues!

• Praise the Good, Redirect the Bad

Positive reinforcement works wonders. When your know-it-all does something right, celebrate it. We once had a team member who was terrific at finding errors in other people’s work. We started calling her “Eagle Eye Emily” and even had a little trophy made in her honor. This positive recognition motivated her to contribute more constructively and made her less combative.

• Use Humor to Defuse Tension

Nothing eases a tense situation like a well-placed joke. When your difficult team member starts going off the rails, try using humor to lighten the mood. For example, I once had a team member who would stubbornly refuse to change his mind. We started calling him “Captain Unyielding” and would playfully salute him during meetings. The humor helped him see the absurdity in his behavior, and he eventually became more open to other perspectives.

• The Sandwich Technique

When delivering feedback to difficult people, use the sandwich technique: a layer of positive feedback, followed by constructive criticism, and finally, another layer of positive feedback. This approach can help you address issues without alienating the person in question. For example, we once had a team member who would always argue with others. We said, “Bob, your passion is admirable, but sometimes it can come across as confrontational. If you could work on being more open to other people’s ideas, it would make our team even stronger. And hey, we’re all grateful that you’re not a professional wrestler!”

• Give Them Ownership

Sometimes, know-it-alls just need to feel in control. Assign them tasks where they can take the lead, allowing them to feel like they’re calling the shots. For example, we had a difficult team member who always wanted to be right about office politics. We put him in charge of organizing team-building events. Suddenly, he was too busy planning “Survivor: Office Edition” to worry about being right all the time.

Remember, dealing with difficult people is part of the job when you’re in HR. By understanding the reasons behind their behavior and using humor and empathy, you can help steer your team towards a harmonious and productive workplace. After all, nobody wants a team that’s constantly at war, except maybe Hollywood screenwriters looking for a new sitcom idea!